"When I stand before your throne, dressed in glory not my own,
what a joy I'll sing of on that day.
No more fears or broken dreams, forgotten is the minor key,
everything as it was meant to be.

And we will worship, worship
forever in your presence we will sing.
And we will worship, worship you,
an endless hallelujah to the king.

I will see you as you are
love you with unsinning heart
and see how much you paid to bring me home.
Not till then Lord shall I know
Not till then how much I owe.
Everything I am before your throne.

No more tears, no more shame, no more sin or sorrow ever known again.
No more fears, no more pain.  
We will see you face to face, see you face to face."
~  Matt Redman Endless Hallelujah

This song has been at the forefront of my mind and heart as my school and many others mourn the loss of our beloved instructional learning coach.  At 38 years old, she was flown to Louisiana for a liver transplant.  With great hope, she was first on the list.  The doctors found internal bleeding and her body responded by shutting down her organs.  Last Sunday she went to be with Jesus.  

I have thought of God's great delight welcoming her into heaven.  She was one of the people who carried me through my year in 5th grade.  Without judgement, she repeatedly came to my class to help me generate lessons to help my students.  She would teach, we'd teach together, and we'd brainstorm ways to help my learners.  Even this year in first grade, she sat down with me many times to sift through new curriculum.  The position may be filled, but there will never be a way to replace her.  Her legacy will live on in my school district for years through the lives of teachers and students she impacted.  

A Season of....

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. ~ Philippians 4:6

     This is the verse that I knew, but chose not to live last summer as I was very anxious anticipating all the changes professionally of a new district, school, and grade.  This combined with continued home renovations was unnerving me to say the least.

    This is the exact verse on the page of a prayer journal one of my students gave to me on Friday, our last day of school.  The verse is printed on the page immediately next to his personal note to me.  Wouldn't you know that each page of the journal has truth from God's word and one of the next pages says:

To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven.~Ecclesiastes 3:1

Amen!  I am thankful that I am not in charge of choosing the purpose or seasons of my life.  Instead, God in his infinite wisdom and meticulous planning prepared each of these before I was born (Psalm 139).   

This Spring has been full of new life, spiritual growth, and celebration.  Now that school is out, I'll include a few pictures of what God's been up to in my life. This has been a season of building and gathering friendships, laughing and celebrating, a time of planting, and a time to be born!


In February, my friend, Emilie, came out to visit   She helped out in my classroom and we traveled to Redwood forests and Monterey.  It was special to share my students with her for a few days and to show her around 'my world'!

In March, a few friends and I hosted Kristin's baby shower.











In May, my students and their parents came to celebrate all they've learned this year at an open house.  In this area, it's popular to have an 'Open House' each spring to showcase projects completed throughout the year.  It was rewarding to visually see the projects that have taught both the students and myself. 

In May, Baby Sellers arrived just a few days late.  We are all thrilled to finally meet the little one  we've been praying for the past 9 months!

Unspeakable Joy

"The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with joy."  ~Psalm 126:3

     This time of year naturally brings reflection on God's faithfulness throughout the school year.  Yet God's fingerprints are evident, not only on the closing school year, but on many long awaited events that have taken place this past week.  So, I'm sharing each of them with you, in hopes that you may also rejoice and stand in awe of what he's done.  Some may seem insignificant, but I feel like they prove God delights in demonstrating his love through big and little things.

Saturday, May 10th:  Baby Shower, Weights, and Mulch

1. The day began with a baby shower for one of my friends.
2. After the shower I went to look for hand weights with a gift card I had.  Believe it or not, the store only had one box of weights for exactly the amount of my gift card, 5 lbs, and purple!  Perfect.
3. Later that evening Paul and I were at Lowes browsing the garden section.  We've needed mulch for our vegetable garden, but had been putting it off.  An employee walks up to us and says he has 5 bags of opened mulch in the color we needed for a $1 each.  (They would've been 3-4 dollars regular price.)

Monday, May 12th: Sold

1. Paul sold a car he'd' been working for the past two months.

Wednesday, May 14th: Scholarship

1. I received a scholarship for the three classes I took between January and April.  It paid for over half of the cost!

Thursday, May 15th: Outing with Students

1. Schools in this area have jog-a-thons to raise money for the PTA.  My school awarded the top 9 fund raisers a limo ride to a pizza buffet and movie.  Since three of the students were in my class, I was invited to go!  They hired a substitute for half the day and off I went!

Friday, May 16th:  Bible Study Group: Baby and Team mate
                I meet with two friends weekly to study God's word.  We met while teaching on the same team 2 years ago.  Even though we've all taught at different schools this year, God's continued to grow our friendships.

1. Kristin gave birth to a healthy baby girl.  Although the little one decided to be a few days late, we'd been anticipating her arrival for weeks.  Not knowing the gender of the baby had us all in suspense throughout Kristin's pregnancy.
2. At nearly the same time I received a picture of the baby, I received another text from our other Bible Study member.  God gave me the gift of her friendship while mentoring her 2 years ago during her first year of teaching.  She applied to my school system back in March.  90 applicants were chosen to be interviewed for around 10 positions.  She was hired for one of the open positions without being told where or what she'd be teaching.  We'd all been waiting to hear her placement.  The news was out....her placement is none other than the room right beside of me, at my school and in my grade next year.  Unbelievable!

Lesson 2: Sowing and Reaping

"Remember this:  Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously."  2 Corinthians 9:6

       The first day of school I drove to school with the radio off praying.  I didn't know what to do and was terrified of the year that lay before me.  Knowing God has placed me in this position, I resolved to take it one day at a time.  
       As I prayed in a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions (fear, resentment, etc.)  God engrained the truth of this verse on my mind.  He said:

You will reap what you sow this year.  If you approach your students with joy, they will give joy back to you.  

If you approach them with resentment, that's what you're going to get back.

In that moment God left the choice up to me.  I had a choice about how I would approach each day.  When I am tried, frustrated, or unmotivated, that's the fruit I receive back from my students.  When I am cheerful, loving, and energetic, I receive that back from my students. 
      This principle also applies to family, marriage, and friendships.

You reap what you sow

Lesson 1: Identity

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith."~ Hebrews 12:2

This was the verse in my devotional this morning.  I'm in a season, where the truth of the verse immediately began to seep into my soul.  

Fix my eyes.....focus on Jesus

Why?  because he perfects my faith.

What a year!  As the school year winds down, I find myself unable to express all the truths God has taught me this year.  However, I'd like to share a few lessons God's taught me in hopes that they encourage you and may even be true in your own life.

                                    My identity is in Christ.  

         As many of you know, I moved to my husband's hometown in California a few years ago.  The first few months were hard as I pursued a job, church family, friendships, etc.  God provided a job within 2 months of substituting teaching in a grade I loved.   God used my 2 years teaching at the school to build local friendships and even a Bible Study group with a few other teachers.  However, it was clear this was not where God wanted me to permanently teach.  Last Spring when I began to knock on doors of other opportunities. God had filled me with peace and joy on the way home from one of my interviews.  Afterwards I felt this was his way of preparing me for the shock of the offer, because later I was offered a 5th grade teaching position in this well respected district.   After 7 years of teaching (and loving) kindergarten-2nd grade, I worried about it all summer.  By the end of the summer I realized that though I was intimidated by teaching a grade I had no experience in and knew little about, my real battle was a spiritual struggle.  
           I felt like so many parts of my identity changed when I moved here-  living near my family, my home church, cats, friendships, my home, and so on.  Teaching "little ones" was one part of who I was that God had allowed to be constant until last summer.  I begged God to please open up a younger grade and allow me to do what I loved.  He said no.   
           He wanted me to learn that my identity was in HIM.....not in the grade I teach.  
           The first 3-4 months of the school year were just as hard as I thought they'd be.  Once December hit, I began to relax.  I've learned that I love teaching period...yes I still prefer the younger grades, but God can provide purpose in any grade.  and.....I LOVE my students.  Saying goodbye to them and sending them off to middle school in a few weeks is going to be very bittersweet.  God's used these students to bring joy, encouragement, and growth in my life.  I will miss their smiles and laughs.  I will miss the relationships God's grown over the last 10 months.  His faithfulness to me this year humbly brings me to my knees. I'll NEVER forget this year. 
           I needed to learn this lesson from God.  He's placed me at a great school with a great team and staff and now, next year, he's allowing me to go back to first grade.  However, in the future, if he decides to move me back to an older grade, I desire to  trust him and go without such a fit.

Worth

"Long lay the world in sin and error pining till He appeared and  the soul felt it's worth."    O Holy Night


"I think of Mary and the virgin birth, and I'm amazed by how much God thinks we are worth, that he would send his only Son to die and sometimes Christmas makes me cry....tears of thankfulness, tears of hope. I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know there is peace on Earth for every heart to find."~ Mandissa and Matthew West ,  Sometimes Christmas Makes Me Cry


These two songs' lyrics prompt reflection within my heart this Christmas. These words remind me that Christmas is about Jesus.  He doesn't change, his presence doesn't fade, his love is constant....

Christmas is about God telling you that YOU are of great worth.

Christmas is about God showing you your worth.  God sent Jesus, his Son, to Earth. God knew without Jesus we'd be eternally separated from him.  Jesus came and died for our eternal salvation.  That's how much God thinks we are worth. When we place our trust in Jesus, God sees Jesus' righteousness when he looks at us instead of our sins, mistakes, shortcomings, etc.  

That's how much God thinks we are worth.

Praying you find Jesus' peace on Earth.

Thanks-remembering

     I woke up on Thanksgiving morning trying not to cry the tears that were forming.  One by one, the generation of my dearly loved grandparents have gone to be with Jesus.  As a child, you think traditions will hold forever.  I grew up traveling the four hour drive to my parents' hometown in rural West Virginia.  The soundtrack for the drive was a Reader's Digest Country Christmas Collection. 
      My family always arrived to countless hugs and feasts on both my mom and dad's side.  When my grandma had her own house it was always full, each bedroom and couch filled with extended family.  You'd never know she had extremely painful arthritis and back pain from fused vertebrae.  Once we all showed up, she came alive in the kitchen.  You didn't bother asking for recipes because she didn't need any.  "A little ____, a little ________"  etc.  Her specialties?  green beans and homemade bread.  Oh yeah...and pies: cherry, lemon, chocolate, mincemeat, apple, peach, and so on.  If she knew it was your favorite, she made it and lined it up with the other pies across her piano.  In her later years I drove up a few days early to help her make pies, only to be fussed at, "Those aren't pie making clothes!  You can't make pies in those clothes!"  So I'd change and return...she'd accept the help only under direct supervision.  Whether there were more side dishes or pies, it's hard to say.  Even as an adult, my seat was usually at the "kids table" with my sister, brother, and a few cousins.  
      After days of preparation and cooking, you'd think she'd take a few days to recuperate.   Oh, no!  Because next to cooking, shopping was one of her favorite activities.  So, around 5:30 a.m. on Black Friday my sister and I would get in her car and ride 30 minutes into Maryland to go to the mall.  This began when she no longer knew what to get us for Christmas.  So she'd give us an envelope of money and help us pick out Christmas gifts from her.  Grandma freely gave her fashion advice.  The most important rule:  Don't buy something drab.  She wasn't afraid to tell you, "That's drab!"  We started each year with breakfast biscuits at Chickfilla.  Then we'd roam from one side of the mall to the other skipping very few stores.  Even in her last years she took us, waiting for us outside the stores.  By noon when all the door busters were over, mom and dad would meet us at Jerry's Pizza for lunch.  Grandma and dad would pile a plate full of banana peppers for their pizza and I'd get a Strawberry drink at Orange Julius.  This continued at least 10 years. 
      So on Thursday, I woke up smelling the feast, hearing the voices scurrying around, and trying to keep warm.  These memories are ingrained and available to replay anytime.  That's when the tears started to form.  Tears of thankfulness that I have these memories, yet tears of sorrow that they'll remain in the past.  Tears that Paul never got to meet my grandma and that she couldn't be at our wedding. 
       My grandparents are a treasure.  They taught me about love and the importance of family despite distance.  They taught me the importance of  connecting and relating to each other despite differences.  
        Looking back, makes me realize how much more I should treasure the present.  Nothing in life is constant except the Lord.  People come into our lives, and we can't take their presence for granted.   On Thanksgiving evening Paul and I walked a block down the street to his parents' house and gathered with his whole family.  I carried a bowl of green beans I'd made that were a far imitation of grandma's.  We have two nieces and two nephews on his side, one of each celebrating their 5th birthday.  I sat on the floor with my one year old niece, Molly, in my lap playing the princess game and Scooby Doo game we bought for the twins....and I thought...these memories are precious too. 

Life Lessons from David

   One thing I love about Bible Study is that it chronicles seasons of growth as God's word is lived out in every area of life.  For the past 3 months I've been studying the life of David with a dear friend.  Lessons from God transcend time, applying to every circumstance.  The past 3 months have been difficult for me during several transitions.  As we conclude our study, reflecting on all the lessons God's personally applied in my life during this time leaves me in awe, yet again, of his loving faithfulness.
     Let me share a few things I've learned with you:

• Leadership is meant to grow others (as explained in an earlier post)
• There is conflict when your position exceeds your passion for it.  When Saul was chosen to be Israel's first king, they couldn't find him because "he was hiding in the baggage." 1 Samuel 10  He wasn't sure he wanted the position of king.  We run into conflict when we are given jobs, responsibilities, and positions that we lack desire or purpose to fulfill.
• Obstacles should be measured beside God, not our own strength.  When Goliath was blaspheming God's name, the men of Israel shook with fear because of his physical size.  However, David measured Goliath by the size of God.  (1 Samuel 17)  I'm guilty of measuring circumstances and obstacles with my own strength, ability, and energy, instead of God's.
• As God's child, my feelings don't have to control me. (1st John 3:20)
• God prepared David for his role as king through every circumstance preceeding his kingship.  (1 Samuel 23)  "We often want to be called of God, then ushered painlessly into a position of service and honor, miraculously possessing the character our callings require.  God doesn't work that way.  Our appointments are about God's glory.  God always works to prepare us to serve Him, but he rarely prepares us in ways we expect.  Any work we've grown accustomed to is usually a work completed.  As soon as we've learned one lesson, He brings another.  He will continue to work in us until we see His face."  Beth Moore   He never meant for our lives to be stagnant.
• Focusing more on our battles than on God causes us to lose perspective; our battles look bigger and God seems smaller. Psalm 10 begins focusing on the surrounding calamity and ends with realizing who God is and his faithfulness.
• Battles can either make us weaker or stronger. (2 Samuel 3:1)
• We must be more focused on God's opinion than that of other's.  When Saul was pursuing David to kill him, David was given a few opportunities to bring harm to Saul.  David decided not to raise his hand against Saul because God had anointed Saul as king.  Despite the opinions of others, David cared most about what God thought.

• Personally, God convicted me about a situation where I did not put God's opinion of me above another's.  Afterwards, I repented, asking, "Do I care more about that person's opinion of me or what God thinks?"  Thankfully, this allowed great growth.  I'm learning to experience the peace that comes when I know I'm right before God, despite what others may think.  There's great freedom in that.  It removes emotions of defense and replaces them with peace.

 Thankful,
    Sarah

Two concerts in two days

     Ever since we drove across the United States in the summer of 2012 and stopped in Nashville without going to a concert, my country music loving husband has reminded me, "I've never been to a concert."  I decided he'd said that enough so we bought tickets to go see one of his favorites, Zac Brown.  The concert was Friday night.  Shortly after work we drove two hours to Fresno and were wowed by the musical talent of this band.  Paul doesn't say much so you have to learn to read his body language.  When he gets his phone out and starts taking pictures and videos, you know he's having a great time. It was a late night, but well worth it. 

     Ever since I found out the Zac Brown Concert was the same weekend as Winter Jam (a tour of 10 Christian music artists), I debated whether two concerts in two days was too much.  However....Crowder was going to be there.  My appreciation for his worship music began my freshman year of college and has been on the soundtrack for each season I've been through since.  There's something to be said about music that grows with you so....
    

We drove up to Sacramento last night to worship the Lord with 13,000 others.  It was an amazing opportunity and uplifting to see so many gathered in
the name of Jesus. David Crowder had the crowd worshiping and praising our Savior in "down home" hoedown style.

    This weekend is one of the first that Paul and I have been able to spend entirely together since school began.  Renovations continue, school work stretches, and extra opportunities for income are presented.  I'm thankful for the time we spent together sharing music we each enjoy.

     

The meaning of leading

As you know the word "grow" holds great significance for me (as evidenced by the theme of my blog).  This week's Bible Study teaching planted spiritual seeds, allowing me to reflect on the living Word and truth of God in my life.  
My fall Bible study has focused on the life of David.  As it comes to a close, we studied his last words in 2 Samuel 23.  In verse 3-4 David says,
The God of Israel spoke, the Rock of Israel said to me;
'When one rules over men in righteousness, when he rules in the fear of God, he is like the light of morning at sunrise on a cloudless morning, like the brightness after rain that brings the grass from the earth.'

Come to find out the original word for "rules" is the same word used in Genesis 1;16 and 18 when the sun governs the day with light.  So, rules=governs.  

Think about what that means... The purpose of leadership is not just to lead.  When a leader governs rightly (as God does) and seeks to honor the Lord, he or she brings light (like the sun) to those under their authority. Not only do they bring light, but they also bring GROWTH, just as the sun causes the grass to GROW.  

I love that!

It caused me to reflect on the present leadership roles I've been given and the present leaders I'm under.  I'm responsible for the growth of 26, 5th grade students. God has exploded my heart with love for them in ways I thought I would only ever love primary students.  They are some of the most kind, fun, and caring 9 and 10 year olds ever.  I am their teacher to grow them.

However, I'm also under a leader who fits this description.  My principal has been full of grace, encouragement, and mercy during my transition to a new district, school, and grade.  She's been supportive and involved.  Once a week a few of the teachers gather to pray for our public school campus.  My principal is also present.  Her leadership is growing me.

Above all earthly leadership, God continues to lead my life with light and growth.

In 2003 I heard someone offer a powerful prayer and have not forgotten it:
"Thank you God for loving me enough to not let me stay the same."

Amen!

Psalm 126 "The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with joy."

God's fingerprints have been all over our spring and beginning of summer.  I often feel the urge to blog and then am not sure how to put it all into words. 

1. Since I last wrote, Paul and I both got new jobs.  He started his in May and I will begin mine in August.  He loves his one mile commute and coming home on his lunch breaks.  It was bittersweet to say goodbye to my students after teaching them both first and second grade, however, I know God is preparing me for a new season of teaching (for the students and myself)...one that I would have never applied for: 5th grade.  For this primary grade lover, 5th grade is definitely an opportunity for feeling intimidated and/or taking God up on an opportunity for growth and stretching.  I'd love your prayers as early August approaches!
2. My parents also came to CA for the first time to visit and see "our world."  Paul scrambled to prepare our 2nd bedroom and install our 2nd bathroom (from scratch), but pulled it off around midnight on the night before they arrived. :)  I was able to share my old and new schools with them.  They were also able to worship with us at our church. 
3. Our first anniversary!  We celebrated our first anniversary with both sets of parents and Paul's grandma.  What a wonderful day to reflect on the past year of growth and memories together.  
4. Each of the previous blessings has caused us to look up and thank God for how involved he is in each detail of our lives....yet today something happened that made me feel a sense of urgency to blog..

In February I found a lump on my skin.  It caused some alarm since I've never had anything like that before.  After several doctor's appointments, an ultrasound, and a surgeon's consultation, nobody seemed sure what it was.  We decided it was best to remove and biopsy it.  This was scheduled for June 11th.  However, after we realized how much better Paul's new insurance plan would be compared with my old plan, I canceled the surgery so that I could have it done under the care of a doctor within our new network.  On June 26th, my mom and I went to a dermatologist, who felt sure it was a cyst and could be removed.  Please know that I do NOT like needles in any fashion, but knew this was part of stewarding my body.  This procedure was scheduled for today.  For the past few days I haven't been able to see or feel the lump.  I told the doctor this as she prepared the supplies.  
She took a look and agreed,  "I don't see any need to cut you open if I can't even feel where I need to cut.  You're one of the lucky ones that had the cyst go away on its own."  

I replied, "I'll be singing a praise song on the way home."  
That's not luck!  That's GOD!  He heals.  
Paul and I will fly east early Thursday morning for my brother's wedding. Now, there's no need to be 
concerned about the care of the wound, etc. during all the traveling and festivities.   Thank you Jesus for your love and healing physically and spiritually.

Redwood Remembrances - a living and lasting legacy

    My grandpa passed away on March 29th, passing the torch of faith to his descendants.  He carried this torch throughout his life as he continued to answer God's call to ministry.  Several times he retired from preaching, and several times he stepped back to the pulpit to shepherd God's people.  Sowing the word of God creates a lasting legacy that continues to bear fruit in the lives of those who knew him.
     For his family, the legacy begins with faith and extends to countless character traits unique to grandpa.  Sure, there are the deer he fed, then hunted from his bedroom window.  His trademark car since the 80's?... a Subaru station wagon (red in later years) with the license plate "Redwood."  Each time he retired one of these cars, it was replaced by another Subaru station wagon.  While driving around, he never got tired of tinkering with the gadgets in the car or narrating each landmark along the route.  If you weren't riding with him, never fear, he had a set of walkie-talkies to make sure you didn't miss anything along the way.  Then there's Christmas gifts... You never knew what the gadget of the year would be.  However, once one person opened their gift, shortly you saw a complete set of identical treasures filling the room.  Perhaps, a crockpot in the shape of a football, a year's supply of paper towels, a bacon rack for the microwave, a TV screen with moving fish, etc. 
      It's hard to pick which memories are the most endearing here.  My family made several displays representing my grandpa at the funeral "viewing."  There were jars of seeds, an ice cream maker, fishing pole, etc.  What stood out to me the most were the endless pictures of memories each family member had to share.  He was at EVERYTHING: graduations, sporting events, marching band shows, commissioning for mission trips, vacations, holidays, weddings, etc.  Each one of my cousins dearly loved, and was dearly loved by him.  All 11 of us have different talents and interests, yet he loved each one of us and related to us as individuals.  There are common threads of him reflected in us (faith in Jesus, serving, gardening, art, hunting, fishing, a love of nature, traveling).  From him we learned that that family is a treasure. 
       Surely his neighbors will remember his ever expanding orchard of trees:  pecan, apple, peach, pear, plum, apricot, etc.  His plastic bag scarecrows with hand-drawn faces were always creative in the vegetable and melon gardens.  While he planted fruit and vegetable seeds, the seeds of truth and trust in Jesus are what will continue to bear fruit.  A pastor and friend of my grandpa spoke at his burial, referencing 1 Corinthians 15:35-49.  As I looked around, I saw living fruit in each of the people Grandpa loved and served.  We'll always have the memories and we'll always have the call to sow seeds of faith into the lives of others.   I'll miss his presence in my life, yet know that we'll only be apart for a short time.

"Who am I?"

Tonight as I was driving home Travis Cottrell's version of "Just as I Am" came on the radio.  The newly added chorus resonated within my soul and in light of Easter and Christ's resurrection, I wanted to share it.

"I come broken to be mended,

I come wounded to be healed,
I come desperate to be rescued,

I come empty to be filled.

I come guilty to be pardoned

by the blood of Christ the Lamb

and I'm welcomed with open arms,

Praise God, just as I am. "

Immediately, I thought, Who am I

• to be filled?
• to be the receiver of God's consuming grace and redemption?
• to be provided for physically, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually?
• and on...

God completely amazes me with the places he brings us to, the situations he brings us through, and the growth he provides during each season.  I am in awe of how God fills.  His word says: "so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:11  His purpose stands.
Before I came to CA nearly two years ago, I was told that the job market was really tough and there were no teaching positions.  After two months of subbing, God provided a full time position at a school full of young teachers.  Through this, God provided me with local Christian friends around my age.  God's economy is beyond what our human eyes can see.
Tonight I had dinner with two of those friends.  I marveled at God's plan to build friendships while providing a job. 
For years I've had a sewing machine, but very little knowledge of it.  A woman from my church decided to offer free sewing lessons to those of us who wanted to learn.  She brought me home a few days ago and it was such a blessing to learn more about God's faithfulness to her.  
Of course I also see God's hand in my marriage.  Paul and I continue to merge our separate lives into a partnership for God's glory.  
The beauty of all this is that I come to Christ just as I am and he does much more than I could ever ask.  He goes ahead of me.

"Just as I am, I would be lost

but mercy and grace

my freedom bought

and now to glory in your cross

Oh Lamb of God, I come, I come." 

I am full.
God overflows. 

Daniel

There are people that walk into our lives and God instantly gives us a connection and love towards them.  In 2006, I was hired for my first teaching job as a kindergarten teacher.  I scrambled to prepare everything for open house day when I would finally meet my first class.  The day arrived and the first student to walk through my door was Daniel.

That year I learned that I loved teaching kindergarten and loved each one of my 24 unique students.   Half way through the school year Daniel told his parents he wanted to visit me at my home.  We explained my 45 minute commute and the logistics so he settled on a Burger King dinner date. 

In May, when his family announced they were moving, I was devastated.  I'd come to have a special bond and love with each of these five people.  They had come to America so that Daniel's father could attend seminary at Liberty University.  That spring, he completed his classes and received a position as pastor in California.  That seemed so far away to me!   Daniel's last day was field day.  Our class wished him well with hot Cheetos, his favorite snack, and a shirt we had all signed. 

Little did I know, God planned for this family to stay in my life well beyond that year.  On several of my visits to see Paul, I was able to spend a night with them.  We scattered a few emails throughout the past 3 years, but no visits had taken place.  Last month Daniel emailed me from his newly established email account.  We set up today for a reunion. We split our 3 hour drive and meet in the middle for lunch.  I can't explain the joy in seeing him and his mother again.  They are a true picture of God's encouragement, love, and graciousness.  Only as we talked did he humbly reveal that he recently skipped a grade to be in 7th (still making straight A's).  He's read through the entire Bible 5 times!  Isn't God amazing?  He has specific purposes for Daniel, yet Daniel doesn't seem to realize what a gift of learning he has.  I'm so thankful to be a part of watching these plans unfold over the years!

Christmas

Paul finished our living room floor just in time to buy our first Christmas tree.  We prepared for the parade that goes right down our street.

After celebrating with family in CA, Paul and I packed our bags and headed east just in time for Christmas. 
Our first Christmas as husband and wife was truly blessed.  My entire family was home and together for our visit.  Ben's fiance, Kate, came for a week and my grandpa came too.  During our time we were able to spend quality time initiating Paul into the family and catch up with friends.  I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

VanGilder Clan

I treasure every visit with Grandpa.

Sisters :)

First time plowing snow

let's go jogging

Growing Conditions

    My move to CA and desire for a garden has required me to learn about the plants that grow here and their growing conditions.  The climate and temperature pattern is very different; rain only falls in the late fall and winter and the temperatures stay milder.  This requires sprinklers in our yard if we want anything to grow, but also opens up a lengthy list of perennials since the plants don't die in cold winter temperatures.  Instead of apple orchards, you'll see almond orchards.  The leaves are starting to change (finally!).  The maples and oaks are scattered among Chinese Pistache trees.
    This weekend was a hard one to be away from my family.  They gathered together to take part in a very exciting event.  Up until Friday, I didn't realize that I'd be the only one not present.  Secondly, there are some things that need to be taken care of that would be so easily accomplished if I was there and could do them myself.  However, relying on someone else makes it more complicated. 
     Yes, I miss being home, but you know what?  Lately, in spite of these challenges, I feel thankful.  Life is always changing and no season is ever permanent.  There are many reasons to be thankful for this exact time in life because there will never be another season exactly like it and when it is gone, I will remember it with a smile of thankfulness.  As I was reading the "Thanksgiving" sections of New Testament letters this morning, God drew this analogy: 

 "what grows in one season (climate, location, or set of circumstances) can't grow as easily in another"  

Just as it is for plants, so it us for us.  He brings us to specific circumstances to accomplish specific purposes and fruit. God is growing a different kind of fruit in my life during this season.  As he guides me along his perfect path, here are some of the things uniquely specific to this season that I'm thankful for.   

•  God, who continues to be near and present in each step, continually forgiving me because he loves me
• my marriage to Paul and the opportunity to experience life together
• our church and church family,  the genuineness and desire to grow in Christ and the constant ways they reflect Christ to others, their openness to let people serve.  This church of around 100 members just raised over $26,000 for missions at their fall bazaar!
• my students.  teaching them for 2 years in a row gives the opportunity for strong connections and to gaze upon so much growth!
• my team at school.  This unique group of women is encouraging and supportive.  We're united as a grade level.  This past week we gathered to celebrate an upcoming wedding, two of us traveled to San Francisco to preview a possible field trip, and two of us are starting a Bible Study together.  
• the progress toward making our house into a home
• Cleo, the friendly neighborhood cat, that realizes I want a cat so she visits me often.  

• friendships in the area.  This evening while jogging I ran into my friend, Ericka and her little Lucas.  It's amazing how many similarities we have and how easy it's been to become friends.
• the frequent communication I have with my sister, brother, and parents 
• my in-laws, nieces and nephews
•  as life continues, the list grows...

     

the quilts

It's interesting to think about the symbolism behind gifts and how this represents our relationship to the giver.  God, the perfect Giver, always has purpose and symbolism behind his gifts.  Just what we need, during the perfect season, for the growth and purposes he desires.  Often the themes of his gifts are similar, yet the representation and timelines are different for each of us. 

So it is with these quilts.  The quilter interpreted the theme of growth (in a gardening sense and beyond), love, and life differently, yet each is symbolic of the path God guides me along. 

Quilt 1:  Shortly after Paul and I were engaged, my aunt, Debbie, told me she wanted to make us a quilt for our wedding gift.  When she asked me for ideas, I shared with her the idea of "growing" and seeds.  The front has fabric patterns representing this and the back has a "vine-like" stitch.



Quilt 2:  When Paul and I returned from our honeymoon, this quilt was on our bed.  His mom's friend, Michelle, sewed it using batik (very African like)  patterns in purples, browns, and greens.  On the back, the fabric is a vine. The stitching is hearts, perfect for a wedding quilt.

 


Quilt 3:  Have I mentioned that our church is FULL of quilters?  A few weeks ago, one of the ladies in my Bible Study group gave us this quilt at our CA wedding reception.  It has many batik patterns, with a forestry background.  Paul's parents said it had "his" and "hers" sides. 

quilts

The arrival of fall weather makes me want to trade my shorts in for jeans and curl up under a quilt.  Speaking of quilts...we were blessed with three handmade quilts as wedding gifts.  Each one as unique as the quilter who created it.  Perhaps over the weekend I'll take some pictures and explain the significance of each to me.  
Life is like a quilt....each season stitched together to create a bigger picture of God's plans and purposes.  Sometimes the pieces seem predictable, perfect squares.  Other times, the pieces don't make sense until placed next to another piece to complete the shape.  That is the reason I'm changing my background for awhile.  Tis the season for something cozy, yet creative....pattern unknown, yet purposeful.

catching up and slowing down

It's been too long since I've reflected on life through the pages of this blog.  The pace of life quickened greatly with the start of a new school year.  Even though I kept the same students this year, teaching a new grade continues to stretch me.  Once I heard a prayer, "Thank you God for not letting me stay the same."  The power of it still resonates in my heart.  Praise God that he never stops growing his children.  

 I'm really enjoying second grade and each one of my 27 students.  This year I did a safari themed room so that I could have a piece of Africa around me each day.   Here's a glimpse of it back in August:

Paul and I also celebrated the birth of our new niece, Molly, on October 2nd. 


















His grandma and I attended a "first birthday" party for her great grandson
.

With the continued work on our home and demands of our jobs, Paul and I decided reconnect during a weekend at Lake Tahoe.  It was refreshing to get out of the city and breath in mountain air.  The trees were beginning to change and the salmon were spawning.  God's fingerprints on his creation overtook me. 

The water is clear!

Uncle Paul delighted his niece and nephews with his "made to order" pumpkin carvings.  Aunt Sarah got to be the pulp and seed scooper.  Liz was especially excited about her cat pumpkin. 

Most recently we were able to celebrate our marriage with friends and family here.  I don't have many pictures of my own, but here are a few. 

Our church family and reception planners.

Friends God's provided at school

A couple from our church made all 240 cupcakes

Common language: old FORD cars

Throughout these celebrations I marvel at God's plans and purposes, his beauty and creation.Who are we that we can experience him daily?  Whether life is full or in quiet, still moments..He is present and ever growing us through His Word, circumstances, church family, new friends, etc.